23 Lessons I Learnt in 2023 (beware! harsh truths below)

Thank you for visiting my blog, if this is your first time thank you for coming. I hope to be more consistent and post at least bi-monthly so you can be sure to keep coming back for more.

I was reflecting on some of the lessons I have learnt this year (2023) so i could compile them for my end of year post but there are some incredible truths and lessons here that inspire me every time I go through them I just couldn't wait to share them with you. We still have 3 full months left of 2023 and if these truths would be understood and applied immediately you can still finish this year with a bang even if it's been a tough year for you.

Personally, it's definitely been one of my most trying years but I've lived and experienced enough to know that "tough times never last, only tough people last." `Tough times are simply an indication that you are transitioning from one level to the other. There is no elevation or promotion without a test.

So without further ado, below are some of the most poignant lessons and reminders I have been awoken (some harshly) to this year. I hope they can shed some light on any confusion on your journey too. Here we go:

1. Most of your friends aren’t really your friends. They’re just along for the ride when it’s fun, convenient and valuable. Your real friends are the ones who are there for you when you have nothing to offer in return. They are your darkest hour friends - cherish them. But also remember that NO ONE OWES YOU A DAMN THING!
   

2. Life is peaks and troughs - one day you’re up, next day you’re down, and then the next you’re up again. Don’t let so-called success get to your head, likewise don’t allow so-called failure to get to your heart. KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
   

3. If you’re experiencing no difficulties, problems, or pain you must realise that you probably have aimed too low. You’ve levelled off in your growth and achievement and accepted your current position as your lot in life if you're not facing any challenges. Problems, pain or slippage in performance is a positive sign - a lag in performance ordinarily occurs at the very outset when you are making a quantum leap. It is the pause, before you poise for a jump. It is the temporary loss in momentum that occurs when you’re changing gears. This is not a sign of failure. In fact FAILURE IS NOT THE OPPOSITE OF SUCCESS AT ALL, FAILURE IS PART OF SUCCESS.
   

4. Often in life it seems things get worse before they get better. Be prepared for that sort of development. It is not evidence that you should give up. Everything looks like a failure in the middle. You can’t bake a cake without getting the kitchen messy. Halfway through surgery it looks like there’s been a murder in the operating room. PROGRESS OFTEN MASQUERADES AS TROUBLE. And remember: failure does not mean you’re defeated.
   

5. When you can’t control what’s happening to you, control how you respond to it. THAT'S WHERE YOUR POWER IS.
   

6. We all have Day 1’s based on where and how you grew up. But be very intentional about how you pick your Day 2’s. NUFF SAID!
   

7. Use social media but don’t let it use you. It’s designed to make you wish you were someone else, somewhere else or even with someone else. Curate your consumption and remove anything that brings up negative emotions. It’s ok disconnect for a while, you owe the internet nothing. IT'S PERFECTLY FINE TO DISAPPEAR UNTIL YOU FEEL LIKE YOU AGAIN.
   

8. If taking care of yourself means letting someone down, then LET SOMEONE DOWN.
   

9. Some people will love you. Some people will hate you. Others will simply not give a shit. Just remember - none of it has ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
   

10. Spending time and money with/on people is an investment. Not every investment brings good returns. Re-evaluate who you’re investing your time with. YOU ARE WHO YOU SURROUND YOURSELF WITH.
    

11. Sometimes in life you have to start again. Don’t be afraid to do it. Every time you close one door, ANOTHER WILL OPEN.
    

12. Give people a second chance, but never a third. Once someone shows you who they are, don’t argue. BELIEVE THEM.
    

13. Nobody is coming to save you. SAVE YOURSELF.
    

14. Stop talking about your problems to people. 80% of the people who hear your troubles don’t care and the other 20% are glad you’re having them. If you're going to talk about your problems, you're better off addressing the situation directly and SPEAK LIFE. There is life and death is in the power of your tongue. USE IT!
    

15. It’s ok to make mistakes. Contrary to society’s beliefs it is actually ok to fail at something. In life we learn by making mistakes. You will fall down it’s how you learnt to walk. Nobody called a toddler a failure because they fell 1000 times learning to walk! Don't lose that child-like resilience. Be gracious to yourself when you fall. FALLING IS NOT FAILING AS LONG AS YOU GET BACK UP.
    

16. If you’re going through hell right now, keep going. NO POINT IN STOPPING THERE!
    

17. When you think something good about someone, tell them right away. It’s a good habit that will pay LONG LASTING DIVIDENDS.
    

18. Trying is the coolest thing you can do. Cherish the people who appreciate your efforts. Remove people who try to create their own identity of who you are supposed to be. IT IS OK TO REBRAND YOUR IDENTITY.
    

19. Stop worrying about what other people think of you. Most people aren’t thinking of you at all and most of those who do DON'T EVEN CARE.
    

20. It’s ok to allow old versions of You to die. A new You will be born. The one that is most conducive for your purpose in this current season of your life. DON'T REMAIN ATTACHED TO THE OLD VERSION OF YOU.
    

21. Every season is your season. We only like to talk about the ones where we're winning. But the others are yours too. There's your learning season. Your healing season. Your growing season. Your resting season, and many other seasons. They all matter just as much. So, WHICHEVER SEASON YOU'RE IN, IT'S YOURS!
    

22. Choose a life partner who is aligned with your goals in life and in business. TWO VISIONS (DI-VISION) BRINGS DIVISION.
    

23. "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” Never allow the gossips and whispers of small minds to distract you - you’re their topic of conversation because THEY HAVE NOTHING BETTER GOING FOR THEM.

I actually have so much more to share but I there are even more lessons in the Mindset Transformation Program that will be especially helpful to help you navigate some of life's ups and downs. Be sure to check it out.

In conclusion, I will share this last lesson: be effortless in your pursuit of greatness.

"There is such a thing as trying too hard.

You’ve got to sing like you don’t need the money—

Love like you’ll never get hurt—

You’ve got to dance like nobody’s watching—

It’s got to come from the heart if you want it to work.”